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Aneel Aranha is an author, preacher, and evangelist who has spoken to hundreds of thousands of people around the world. You can find a huge selection of his reflections, articles, sermons, songs and other resources on his website www.aneelaranha.com.

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Online House of Prayer

Heartbreak Hotel

August 24, 2022 • Aneel Aranha • Episode 89

0:00 | 4:14

Heartbreak is one of the most painful things we can experience, especially because there is no Aspirin to dull the pain. So, we build walls around us. But that's not the solution.

089: Heartbreak Hotel

Hello and welcome to The Hope Podcast. I’m Aneel Aranha. Today we are going to talk about how how we shouldn’t be afraid to love again when our hearts have been broken.

Heartbreak is one of the most painful things we can experience, especially because there is no Aspirin to dull the pain. It is one of the reasons people take to alcohol, but the relief Mr. Walker or the Grey Goose provide is temporary, and the pain gets compounded with the sour taste one wakes up with. It isn't just a dry mouth caused by dehydration; it's the taste of bitterness resulting from anger.

When our hearts get broken often—and some of us get them broken a lot!—we start to build walls around ourselves to keep people out so they can't hurt us again. This is a natural defensive reaction, and I am sure we have all done it at various points in our lives to varying degrees. However, the problem here is that while we may be able to keep people out, we keep God out as well because God mostly reaches us through people. And, since he is the only speedy remedy to the heartache, we only succeed in prolonging our pain. So, what can we do?

One: Take the walls down, so Jesus can come in. Although this will make us vulnerable again, Jesus can bring us the healing we need. He can also protect us from future heartache. We often get into relationships that we have no business getting into, practically guaranteeing the heartbreak. Having Jesus close might stop that from happening, although—pardon the figure of speech—sometimes the heart can have a mind of its own and lead us into doing foolish things.

Two: Let Jesus flood our hearts with his love. This can happen only if we spend prolonged time in his presence. We often get angry with him for the pain we feel, but that is stupid: he wasn't the one to break our hearts. On the contrary, he brings healing. "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds" ((Psalms 34:18; 147:3).

Three: Let go of the anger toward the person who broke our heart. Feeling angry is natural, but the longer we hold on to it, the greater the bitterness we will feel and the longer the healing will take. It can also make us do some terrible things.

Four: Give it time. I know it sounds clichéd, but time does heal wounds. Sometimes it can take a lot of time, especially if we loved deeply and truly. However, in time the pain will become a dull ache and then fade away to a mild throbbing every once in a while. Having Jesus by our side can speed this up substantially.

Five: Don't be afraid to love again. Even though it was love that caused all the pain, it is love that can heal our wounds. Love is the most potent healing force in the world, so it serves no purpose to be afraid of it. Besides, it is the nature of believers to love. So, love!

May the Spirit be with you.